Anger may be directed in many directions: At the person you got pregnant with, at yourself, at a doctor who failed to provide you with information you needed to prevent pregnancy, at people who were unsupportive or pressured you to make a certain decision, or you can be angry at your life circumstances. Identifying that you are angry is the first step. Read below for steps on how to address anger and move past it.

Steps to address Anger:

• Identify what triggers your anger – some women will judge and blame themselves for getting pregnant, or be frustrated that they became pregnant while using birth control, or that they became pregnant because they did not use birth control.
• Understand you are not the only woman who has chosen abortion (1 in 3 women have an abortion)
• Acknowledge your anger – anger can be a “wake-up call,” revealing things that once seemed normal as being harmful or unfair. It can give you strength to free yourself from situations that are hurting you.
• Write down your feelings
• Talk to someone you trust

Remember to take care of yourself, physically and emotionally, after the procedure. Because abortion is complex, feelings about it are also complex. There are various activities that can to help you provide for your emotional wellbeing:

• Journaling – Writing can be very therapeutic. The following questions are helpful to write about to remind oneself of your decision: What were your reasons for having an abortion? How would your life have been different if you had not had an abortion?
• Health & Well-being – Do you like to exercise? What are your favourite healthy activities? Is there a hobby you already enjoy, or something new you wish to try? Go out and do those things.
• Get outside – If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed and sad, take a walk outside and get some fresh air.
• Do something nice for yourself – Light a candle and enjoy a hot bath, re-read a favourite book, re-watch a favourite show or movie or get out for a walk.
• Rest – Take time to listen to what your body needs. Turn off phones and gadgets and have a warm bath or a nap.
• Be Creative – Being creative, in any way, can be helpful to release any emotions. Draw something, paint something, sing and dance, cook a favourite meal, or explore a favourite old activity in new way.

Many things in life are beyond our control. But, we can take responsibility for our own states of mind. Meditation is an evidence-based tool proven to improve quality of life, and our ability to cope with stress. All you need is a quiet place where you can sit comfortably. Here is a short meditation you can access anytime you need.

 

To Learn more, visit Moment Meditation at http://momentmeditation.com

Having someone provide care and understanding before, during and after an abortion can be one of the most important factors in your ability to cope well.

If you can’t think of anyone who you might trust to share your story with, you can reach out for free, anonymous support here:

Exhale After Abortion Talkline 1-866-4-EXHALE (Mon to Fri 5 – 10 pm PST Sat – Sun 12 – 10pm PT) Service available in Spanish, English, Cantonese, Mandarin and Vietnamese.

Counselors will support you with pro-voice counselling.

For more information visit www.exhaleprovoice.org

All-Options Talkline – all-options.org or 1-888-493-0092 for unconditional, judgment-free support for all your feelings, decisions and experiences with pregnancy, parenting, abortion and adoption. Mon-Fri 10am – 1am, Sat – Sun 10am – 6pm EST

Each woman will experience different feelings after an abortion and will deal with it in different ways. Many women don’t feel the need to talk after their abortion. For some women, it’s useful to talk through their grief. If you feel it might help you to talk, you can arrange counselling over the telephone at the clinic where you were treated. This service is free.

CounsellingBC.com